Benevolent Sexism

This past Friday we discussed in class the different types of sexism.  One type of sexism that we talked about was benevolent sexism.  Benevolent sexism is when men act chivalrous toward women, this may seem desirable but in the end it makes women appear weak and incompetent.  I never realized that this was a form of sexism and wondered whether I have experienced it before, looking back I realized that I have.

When I was in high school I had a friend who wanted to be closer to me than he already was.  At first it seemed harmless because all he would do is run ahead of me in order to hold the door.  This attitude became more extreme as time went on because it turned into waiting for me by my locker, taking the umbrella out of my hand when it was raining, and walking me to my bus every single day.  I began to question what was going on because I am pretty sure I am capable of holding an umbrella and finding my way to my bus without completely falling apart.  I made the decision to confront him about it when we got back from Christmas break.

During Christmas break, however, he would text me everyday and started to seem really clingy.  I ignored two of his texts because I was working and wasn't allowed to check my phone and he never talked to me again!  I found it really ridiculous to throw away a friendship just because I couldn't answer him right away.

Anyway, I look back at that moment and realize that I was a victim of benevolent sexism.  I now understand how it feels to be treated with this type of sexism and it made me feel incompetent and uncomfortable because I wasn't able to do anything for myself.  I personally don't want to feel that way again.

First Post: Being a Feminist

For class I had to read a book that was based off of the Ted Talk called We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.  This book questions the societal "norms" expected of women.  I highly recommend it because it touches on a lot of facts that don't necessarily have to be true anymore; for example, women are expected to get married and have children and always compromise with their husbands.  Today that doesn't still have to be the case; women don't have to get married to be happy.  Women also shouldn't be judged if they do not get married, after all men aren't.  Unmarried men are praised by their peers as being bachelors but women are constantly being asked when they are going to get married so they don't become spinsters.  Why can men live life unmarried and women can't?  It's completely unfair and adds unnecessary pressure to a young woman's life.